Health and wellbeing, Journey, Musings and personal, Writing and blogging

Roots and Wings

Today, as I watch my two smiley little faces, I really realised that although I’m trying my best, I just can’t protect my kids enough.

I have a daughter that ‘doesn’t fit’, she is more like me in ways than I ever fully realised whilst I was growing up. The kid that’s too loud, headstrong, bossy, needs attention, doesn’t go with the main, and in her endeavours to do the right thing and gain respect, becomes a target as she’s sensitive.

I am lucky she never really wants to spend hours of her time interacting with others over devices (spends her time reading, making dance routines or watching baking videos) but today I realise is the easy target- the one to get an instant rise – the one subjected to the others jokes, dislike and pranks. I ask myself why?

She is abrasive to them, the one minimally accepted…the kid that is just too extrovert, rubs up the wrong way whilst most of the time, is just wanting to please and be accepted.

It’s a real case of ‘I open my mouth and my mother comes out’ and my genetics have cursed her… She stands up for herself and becomes easy cannon fodder. No one really seems to stand her for too long and if there is any disagreement, she tries so hard to defend herself, she comes off worse. Marmite I call it, with not many that want their personalised jar…

It’s taken 36 years to learn the brush off (and to gain some proper strong supportive friends) but I don’t want that late start for my own babies…I want people to see the weird and embrace it, for them to know she is confident, kind and so very loving. She will always stand up for her beliefs but more than that; those dear to her…her opinions are strong but are not there to overpower, and she may not always be right but will fight for truth…

Growing up is hard, and I don’t know what’s happened to make this next generation have no real particular solid bonds or allegiance – we are in a dog eat dog world – where it appears easier to take a step on someone than offer a hand to help them up.

About Me, Birthdays, Health and wellbeing

My first, my last…my everything 

On the eve of my littlest bean’s birthday…number 4…the birthday that means the start of school…the birthday that means leaving me home alone come September…and I want to feel so so happy about how he is growing into one of the nicest people I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting, growing into someone that makes me laugh uncontrollably every day without fail BUT I’m struggling, struggling with the fact that he is my last, my last baby.
No more smells of baby hair, no more waiting for that first smile, no more swollen ankles, no more sick stains on my left shoulder, no more tears in the middle of the night at being useless at breastfeeding…

 But tomorrow he will wake so excited about his day, to see all his friends, to tell them how now he’s a big boy he gets to go to school…and I will smile…

Smile everyday, that I’m lucky, lucky to have two beautiful kids and cuddle him that little bit tighter, knowing that he is my last…

(Simon would this be a good opportunity to ask you for a sausage dog…please?) 😉

Art & Design, Craft, Health and wellbeing, Musings and personal, Uncategorized, Writing and blogging

Does Blue Monday last a month?

January – the start of a new resolutions.
January – a celebration of a new year, new starts, new things – a month that starts with the best intentions; more visits to the gym, less fat more thin, honing ourselves for the better…or in my case, a bikini for a summer holiday (here’s hoping…I think I’ll still keep my full Anne Kellerman style costume handy for this summer, to save the other holidaymakers peepers!)

Ok so went off on a tangent there….back to January… A dry January – a whole month without alcohol, a month of shaking off the dirty daytime drinking habits of Christmas and the over indulgence of let’s face it most of December (Christmas is a month long, right?)

That’s one effort I have made – no alcohol this month. Although, I (in quite a ridiculously backwards way) will celebrate my month of saintliness, by cracking open a bottle of fizz on Sunday to mark how amazing I have been, ahem sorry hubby, we have been, we have been.
It’s been worth it…annoyingly worth it….I haven’t lost a pound, I have however learnt that water is quite refreshing, alcohol added to food improves its taste no end and its nice to have a month free of a hangover, as with age comes great hangovers…piggy eyed, sallow skinned, zombie apocalypse looking Tash hangovers…….

Anyway! Back to January….January that place for new bright things and motivation? Err…no…Why? Why is it that I feel like I’ve lost a bit of creative mojo – and when I say creative – I mean sewing.

Sitting here crocheting in an evening still holds enjoyment, as does needle felting (although I’m only in the early stages of both), but sewing, that pushing myself in to the ‘make’ is something I’m finding difficult.

Maybe it’s just this month – that January feeling – when we can’t all afford to just stop but really feel like we still want that break of Christmas…the time of feeling happy and nostalgic and not giving two craps about money, as we spend more than a small fortune on our little people or loved ones. But it’s not a lone feeling…
My husband has struggled to get back into the swing of things – he’s an electrician (he makes these amazing lights for me in his spare time)

and I think the thought of these dark mornings and cold starts is just as off putting as the quick trek in the rain for the school run.

The only thing I have been motivated about is my 10,000 steps a day, the magic of the Fitbit. And if you are thinking of getting fit or just wanting to make small changes, I highly recommend the Fitbit Charge – counts steps, calories burned, floors climbed and even tracks your sleep and gently wakes you with it’s vibration feature every morning. That has kept me motivated…in a totally different way to one I’m used to. Maybe that’s the problem..we can’t focus our energies on to too many things or we will fail at at least one of them…

But I need to get my sewing head back on and develop a few new ideas that have been circling in my head since Christmas. It will come…tbh it would come back a lot quicker if I could find a decent and fairly priced fabric supplier.

I desperately want to make lots of children’s clothes but sourcing the right prints at a wholesale cost is something I’m struggling with. I love Robert Kaufman, Michael Miller and I’ve found some other beauties from the States but, as I’m in the relatively early stages of my craft and not wanting to order 100’s of metres, I’m sure I’m a bit too small fry for them to give an account to – any advice greatly received here 🙂

I am hoping to visit the Textile Forum in the next couple of months (4th and 5th March for those of you interested, just have to apply for an entrance ticket so hopefully that will open a few doors…and fingers crossed a few accounts…to allow me to sew lots of items for a cost that appeals to all.

Here’s one I made last month…

it had quite a bit of interest as the print is so pretty, so to be able to offer them in all shapes and sizes and to have fabrics of all prints in abundance would make me one happy Tashi..where there’s beautiful fabric, there’s always a happy crafter.

One last little thing before I go…and these seem to be trending all over Facebook at the moment…People’s Seven Secrets – those seven points about you that not everybody knows, and a fair few have given me some proper belly laffs…

Here are mine, well those that are suitable for a blog 😉 ….so spill lovelies, what are yours?

1. I was a standby for the children’s Christmas edition of the Crystal Maze after winning a competition.
2. I can fit my whole fist in my mouth and I can touch my nose with my tongue.
3. I’ve been in love with my husband since I was 12.
4. I’m terrified of flying, even though I was an air cadet and did an amazing victory roll in a Chipmunk when I was 14.
5. I have Misophonia…especially with people eating.
6. I can’t cartwheel.
7. I have one extra long toe, it’s disgusting to look at. The older I get the more it pains me….I think it needs to come off!

The creative mojo will return….I think I’m just stuck at point 4 at the mo!


For those of you that haven’t lost it…send some stitch and positivity my way 🙂
Ta ra for now xx